BHSEC Construction Will Actually Take 1 Millennium to Complete

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A view of the scaffolding and construction at Bard High School Early College. Photo credit to Emma Bally. ‘17.

Grace Wan, ‘18

For BHSEC students, the sight of cranes and sounds of construction have become ordinary. East Houston is littered with construction sites, and Delancey boasts a few of its own. Scaffolding greets students and faculty every morning as they approach the school building. For many, it feels as though the scaffolding has been looming over BHSEC’s front doors for at least a thousand years. Unfortunately, it appears as though the construction will take approximately a thousand more.

While the initial date of completion was set for mid-January, renovations on the school building are now projected to run well into 3017. When asked why the work would take an extra millennium to complete, the Dr. Lerner responded that the construction committee had encountered some “unexpected setbacks.” Some include new regulations from the state about irrigation under the school, inadequate materials, and “an unfortunate run-in with a very angry family of gophers,” which Dr. Lerner refused to elaborate on. The administration remains optimistic that the long construction period will be well worth the wait. Ms. Powell assured, “Though we may not live to see it, it is encouraging to know that our great-great-great-…-great grandchildren will be here to see the new and improved BHSEC.”

The scaffolding, which is being used to help waterproof the school, is of utmost priority. While its initial purpose was to protect against another Hurricane Sandy, the administration soon realized that it would be necessary to safeguard the building from complete submergence as well. Another worker commented, “You never know when a flood or the rising sea levels will finally hit you, and it doesn’t help that this school is right next to the East River.”

The construction committee has added several new projects to their list as well. By the time 3017 rolls around, the school should have an Olympic-size pool on the roof, a fully-equipped gym, stone columns gracing the main entrance, and at long last, paper towels in every bathroom. A construction worker commented, “We’re sure we can handle the first three renovations, but the last one is a bit of a stretch.”

Hopefully, the renovations will indeed be worth the 1,000-year wait. In the meantime, students and faculty can at least enjoy the shade cast by the ever-present scaffolding outside the school building.

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