Simone Williams, ’17
Were you and your friends looking to spice up your Halloween with a scary movie this year but couldn’t find one? Well, be glad you didn’t see this Halloween’s new blockbuster Ouija. There is no number on a scale from one to ten that could rate how horrible it is. Ouija has an extremely predictable plot. You should be glad you did not waste your weekly allowance on seeing this movie, because it is a total flop. I guess the fact that Hasbro was one of the production companies says a lot about why this movie is so disappointingly not scary.
The movie starts off with the main character’s best friend, Debbie (Shelley Hennig), dying after contacting a spirit on a ouija board. So to figure out why her friend is dead, main character Lane (Olivia Cooke) decides to use the exact same ouija board to communicate to her dead friend. But she doesn’t do this task alone. She has to drag in her sister (Ana Coto), a friend (Bianca A. Santos), her boyfriend (Daren Kagasoff) and her dead best friend’s boyfriend (Douglas Smith) into this. For Lane, there seems to be no such thing as grieving over a loss. She must meddle with a spirit board to get closure. I mean, isn’t that what everyone does when a loved one dies?
Throughout the movie, Lane continues to pull stupid moves that result in the deaths of her friends. She also pisses off the audience by breaking all her promises and doing the same stupid things over and over again. I think I can speak for many when I say we were waiting anxiously for when she, too, would die. When it actually is her turn to die, there’s a major plot twist. Dead best friend Debbie comes to save the day. I know exactly what you’re thinking, “WHAT?!” Yes, whoever wrote the movie decided to end it with a happy ending and make all their problems “disappear.” That is not at all what scary movies are about. Why is such an ending even allowed to occur?
One would think that with Michael Bay and Jason Blum as producers, the movie would be, I don’t know, scary? Bay co-owns a production company, Platinum Dunes, which has produced horror movies like The Amityville Horror and Friday the 13th, so one would expect Ouija to live up to such films. The same can be said for Blum, who has produced Insidious and The Purge. Ouija has sort of an American Horror Story vibe but even American Horror Story is scarier than this, and way less predictable. Ouija is basically like every horror movie before it: reflection in the mirror, objects being moved, someone dying after someone else dies. You always know what will happen next because it has already happened to three other people. Ouija is a repetitive movie that left many theatergoers highly upset and disappointed. It makes one wonder whether this is all that horror movies have come to today.
Would I highly recommend this movie to a friend? Of course not. Why should they waste their money when a similar movie with a similar concept will be playing on ABC Family? They shouldn’t. I had high hopes when I went to the theater to see Ouija but honestly, the trailers that came before it were much scarier than the actual movie.